Upheld

At 7:45 PM, after my clinical final simulation for nursing was finally complete, I walked into my dorm in my white nursing scrubs to find our tiny living room decorated with balloons and streamers. "Surprise!" my friends yelled as I walked through the door.

This simulation cost me hours of studying and high levels of stress, so I had commented earlier in the week, "Tuesday night after this is all over, I am throwing a party for myself." But I didn't have to. My sweet friends remembered and threw one for me.

They cooked a hot meal of baked ziti with toasted bread, but that's not all. Every one of my special friends gathered after dinner for a special surprise. "Close your eyes and don't peek," Chelsea told me. She then instructed me to hold out my hand and take the fork she was handing me. Getting a fork in your mouth and taking a bite of an unknown substance with your eyes closed is harder than you might imagine, which brought great amusement to my friends. "What do you think it is?" they asked. As soon as the flavor hit my taste buds, I knew it. "Strawberry cake!" And it was the same recipe that my mom uses for special occasions. "This is my favorite cake in the whole world!" I almost cried.

Tears welled up in my eyes because of the love I knew in that moment. My sweet friends had gone the extra mile by not only throwing me a surprise dinner, but by making my very favorite strawberry cake. They gathered to celebrate my hard work and completion of my first clinical rotation, which I would dare say has been the hardest academic-related thing I have ever done.

And they knew how hard it was because they were there with me the whole way. They knew that I lived in the nursing building and spent all my time in the library. They knew when I came home at curfew after a twelve-hour clinical day. They rubbed my shoulders when I was most stressed and fed me dinner when I hadn't eaten all day. They put encouraging sticky notes on my desk, bought me candy corn just for fun, and gave me gentle reminders by saying, "You can do it. I believe in you. I'm proud of you. You have the strength and mind of Christ." Tear pooled in my eyes because of how thankful I was for them and and their support through it all.

I not only felt their love, but also God's love in that moment. After all, He is the one who has sustained me this entire semester. He is the one who reminded me that this process is a team effort and that He is my strength and my song. If I have learned one thing about the Lord this semester, it is this: He upholds.

He upholds me in my weakness by giving me spiritual strength.

He upholds my efforts by giving me success in my classes.

He upholds my body by maintaining my appetite, providing me with enough rest, and giving me physical strength.

He upholds my friendships when I haven't had very much time to devote to them.

He upholds my relationship with Him even though I haven't had as much time as I'd like to devote to Him either.

He upholds my faith and joy even when I felt like giving up or crashing.

As I sat in my dorm room with a piece of pink cake and a group of amazing friends, I knew the love of God a little more deeply. God sustained me through my friends. He strengthened me through His Word. He calmed me by His Spirit over and over again. He got me through my first clinical, and hopefully, He enabled me to pass my clinical final and validation.

But even if I didn't pass, I know that I have all I need. I have sisters in Christ who are there for me and a God who sustains and upholds me always.

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