Oceans (to all my friends at Hidden Creek)

The scooting of chairs and shuffling of feet indicated that it was time to form a circle and get started. I pulled the old wooden bench up to the piano as one of the men began with a prayer. Although this was only my second time to help lead worship for this group, it already felt comfortable and familiar. That's what the Spirit of God within the hearts of believers does - it unifies us and gives us a sense of home wherever we go. 

I have been hanging out with these friends at Hidden Creek for a while now. I first started going when a small group of friends from church served a dinner there every other week. It wasn't until I started worshipping with them, though, that relationships really began to form. That's what worship does - it unites our hearts with God and one another. 

Sometimes I get nervous about leading others in a time of worship. I don't want the music to be a barrier in any way to true, heart-felt worship. I don't want to be obsessed about messing up a note or two, but at the same time I don't want the music or any mistakes to distract people. I want it to sound good, but I don't want it to make me look good. And I want people to understand why I play, why I sing, and why I lead worship. 

I don't have to worry about any of that with my friends at Hidden Creek. They sing louder than I play. When I mess up, they keep going strong. They appreciate the music, but they worship the Master. The room is flooded with passion and emotion as we worship together...especially when we sing "Oceans". They love that song, and you can hear it in the strength of their voices. 

And I understand why. That song really means something to them. They don't just sing the words, they express them as a prayer from the bottom of their hearts. They are a people with a rough past who are seeking a fresh start. So when they sing, "I will call upon your name and keep my eyes above the waves. When oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace. I am yours, and you are mine", they mean it. They understand what it means to go through a storm more than many of us do...certainly more than I do. When they sing, "You've never failed, and you won't start now," they know that it is true from the faithfulness of God that they have experienced in their own lives. As they sing, "Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me," they are praying for a healing, recovery, and faith that they truly desire.

They encourage me to remember why I am singing, and to consider the meaning of the words that I sing when I worship.

I have always loved the song "Oceans", but now I can't sing it without thinking of them. It means so much more when you know what these people have been through and how they are seeking God and finding refuge and healing in Him. And then they sing that song, and it just about the most beautiful, thing I have ever heard. 

I hear that some of my Hidden Creek friends read this blog. Therefore, I want to take a moment to thank you for the joy that you have given me through getting to know you and through worshipping with you. I want to honor you for your faith and for the work that you are putting into the program. Thank you for allowing me and my friends and family to be a small part. Though we haven't known each other very long, I have come to care about you and love you. I can't wait to get to know you even more. There will be many more Monday-night dinners, celebration dinners, courtyard campfires, and Thursday night worship sessions to come. And there will be many more verses of "Sanctuary", "Humble yourselves", "Lord I need you", and of course "Oceans".

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